Bring the Beer, Leave the Calculator

Bring the Beer, Leave the Calculator

By Corey Rose

Let’s face it. NASCAR’s point system is about as complicated as Chinese sign-language.

Up until 1967, the point system was entirely weighted on the cash prize of each race. Races with smaller purses paid fewer points than races with bigger purses. The series then tried the “distance” approach following a simple premise: The more the miles; the more the points. The system has since been given algorithms season after season and NASCAR has given up on explaining why.

Bro Nameth’s argument: No sport that is BYOB should operate under a point system that necessitates a calculator.

Speaking of beer: 

As testing gets underway at Daytona this week, word is starting to come out that we should expect a complete overhaul of the point system. Smart money says to expect a possible “43-1 arrangement,” where 43 points are awarded to the winner and it trickles down the finishing order to a single point issued to the guy who sucks. Only problem is nothing about NASCAR is smart.

For the sake of racing and American Budweiser, NASCAR needs to throw this out like Jeremy Mayfield. Take our advice:

Follow the lead of our European superiors and add Redneck. Just this past season, Formula-1 adopted a new point system that proved successful by awarding more points to more drivers, but only with the top-10 receiving points. Now with NASCAR’s 43-car field a little expansion would be necessary. The series should award 50 points for a win, 40 for second and in increments for drivers finishing in the top-25. “Start and park” drivers, Casey Mears and everybody else in the back can pick up the beer cans.

This would not only place a greater emphasis on the win, but also make for manageable math. No multipliers. No formulas. Dale Jr-level addition only.

Throw in the NASCAR point wrinkles if you want. You lead the most laps? Here’s a 5-spot. You took the pole position? Awesome, have another 5. You lead a single lap? Give them a point.

All NASCAR needs to do is break out the Nintendo-64. From Wal-Mart Daycares to Fraternity houses across America, there is one point system that has stood the test of time. It came from none other than the game Mario Kart.

It is simple. It is understandable. It awards consistent drivers with tangible point figures. Our sport should adopt a similar model…just no lightning bolts – shits gay.