Happy Crappy Monday Morning……Volume 19.0

Happy Crappy Monday Morning……Volume 19.0

By: J-Shannon

What is going on Bro Nameth World? It is your boy J-Shannon, and I’m back with another solid edition of the Happy Crappy Monday, volume 19. Another lazy weekend for me, although I did manage to get up and make it to the gym both days, so I’m pretty proud of that. This week, we cover everything from LeBron and “His Talents”, The President of the USA, some Charlie Sheen, a little March Madness Bubble Watch, and the famous Wonderlic Test……Sit back and relax, and enjoy the Crappy Ass Monday Morning…..

1. Where should LeBron take his talents next year?

Everyone was predicting all kinds of streaks for the Miami Heat this season. Anyone predict 4 in a row? That’s right, 4 losses in a row. The Bulls put a hurting on the Heat Sunday afternoon, giving the heat their 4^th loss in a row. Going into Sunday, the Bulls were 2-0 this season against the Heat, and were looking for the season sweep Sunday. Well, they got it. Think back to last time the Heat and Bulls played, $115 Million Dollar Man Chris Bosh went 1-19 from the field. 1-19. I’ll promise you one thing, I’ll bet my life on the fact that you give me $115 million; I will go better than 1-19. The shitty performance of Bosh got the blame for the loss, saying that he had a bad game, and ultimately that was the deciding factor. Well Bosh played better today; in fact all 3 members of the “Big 3” were over 20 in points. So what is the problem? Is it a coaching thing? Is it a chemistry thing? I’m not sure, but I will say that the Heat need to get their shit together, or there are going to be some pissed off people in South Beach……

2. Excuse me Mr. President, don’t you have more important S%#T to worry about?

So normally, we don’t talk politics at Bro Nameth. Not that we don’t care, but if we are going to waste our time on arguing a point, it is going to be about something we actually care about. Well, mark this down as the first time I bring up the President in the Happy Crappy Monday Morning. Why? Because it is my column, and I will write about whatever the hell I want to write about. So if we are going to bitch about politics, I’m going right to the top.

Don’t you think that President Obama has a few more issues he should worry about and comment on than the NFL? I mean don’t get me wrong, I think the NFL is amazing, and I don’t want to downplay the importance on the economy a lockout would bring. Let’s look at what he COULD be commenting on: the fact that the country is STILL at war, how horrible his healthcare bill is, the fact that the country pays more for a gallon of gas than a gallon of milk.

The president made a rather ignorant comment this weekend regarding the labor talks with the NFL. Here was the President’s view on the NFL labor talks:

“You’ve got owners, most of whom are worth close to a billion dollars,” Obama said.  “You’ve got players who are making millions of dollars.  People are having to cut back, compromise and worry about making mortgage [payments]. . . .  The two parties should be able to work it out without the President of the United States intervening. . . .  [F]or an industry that’s making $9 billion a year in revenue, they can figure out how to divide it up in a sensible way.”

Why do I have an issue with this statement? Yes, owners make Billions of dollars. But the majority of NFL players only make $200-$400 K annually. I’m not saying they are broke, but it’s not like $200 K is a lot of money these days. You want to talk about sensibility; you would think the President of a country that is spending just north of $100 BILLION annually on the Iraq War, would spend a little more time worrying about that problem…..

Start focusing on what is really important, and we will start calling you Bro-ack Obama. Until then, you’re not going to get much love from Bro Nameth…..

I’m just sayin…..

3. Charlie Sheen business partners with Mark Cuban?

Yes, you read that correctly. Mark Cuban and Charlie Sheen are in talks to put Charlie Sheen on a new TV Series on HDNet. Keep in mind Mark Cuban owns HDNet, so he can put whatever the hell he wants to on the Station. The new show is either going to be a talk show, or a Reality TV Show. Why wouldn’t you jump on this if you are the Cubes? First of all, everything he touches seems to turn into Billions. Second, everyone on the Planet is talking about Charlie Sheen these days. I know one thing, I’ll be watching…..

4. Jamaal Anderson may be the second worse defensive choice in the past 5 years…..

Why? Because ex Jet Vernon Gholston just may be the worse. The absolute dud of a defensive player was cut last week, no surprise to anyone. Think about this: The guy had a $9 Million Dollar Clause in his contract that stated if he was to have one forced fumble, one sack, or one fumble recovery in the 2010 season, he would earn an additional $9 Million on his contract. His total of the 3 last season=0. Look, even the absolute bust Jamaal Anderson manages to fall on the QB every now and then….

5. Bubble Watch….

The Best tournament in the world is right around the corner. Yes, I’m talking March Madness is almost upon us. It’s time to take a look at the handful of teams that are hopeful to get in the tournament, and the 4-5 who will be like the fat kid on the playground when teams are being picked…..translation: they won’t be participating…..

Florida State- What a difference a shot makes. Harrison Barnes Misses the 3pt. shot, and FSU wins and is a lock for the tournament. Now, it looks like they may have to win a game or 2 in the ACC tournament to get in the dance….

Marquette- It really sucks to be Marquette. They have a pretty good team, but they play in the Big East. Oh well, welcome to life in SEC Football. The biggest problem Marquette has is there are 10 teams in their conference better than them…..

Michigan State- They probably make the tournament because they are Michigan State. But their record is decent, although their Strength of Schedule is solid. I think Izzo and the boys are in….

Tennessee- It sure would have helped Bruce Pearl and the boys had they beat a #20 Kentucky team who were 1-6 on the road against SEC teams this year. Well, they blew it on senior night, so the only tournament they may be making is the NIT baby….

Alabama- It’s sad to say that the win the SEC west and still might not make the tournament. Yes, the SEC West is weak, but does Alabama still deserve to dance? The Tide did some things right, but lost some nasty games, and played high schools as a non conference schedule…. They may need to do some things in the SEC tournament next weekend…..

6. I almost feel Bad for Number 44, but not quite….

So with .7 seconds left in this NAIA semi-final game, Danielle Clausen makes a bold move. Check it out below. I’m not sure if what’s more impressive, the fact that she had the presence of mind to make the play, or the amount of people at a Concordia women’s college basketball game…..

7.  Inspirational Story of the Week….

Right here in our own backyard, a solid piece about what really drives Jason Heyward to play the game he loves… Get the tissues out….

8. Hottie of the Week (formerly known as Photo of the Week):

Let’s face it, the photo of the week would be a lot cooler if it was the Hottie of the week. Therefore, starting today, we will now dedicated number 8 to the Hottie of the week….. This Week: Rosie Jones.

9.“One-Liners” of the Week…

*Pete Rose- Looks like Pete is getting a divorce after 25 years of marriage, sorry bro…..

*Minnesota Vikings- Rumor has it they are going to go after Kyle Orton of Denver to be their next Starting QB…. There’s a long term plan….

*Rosie Jones- My new Celebrity Crush….

*Yoo-Hoo- Best Drink I haven’t had in the past 6 months….

10. THE TOP 10 in the TOP 10…

You know how we do this; it’s a weekly countdown of the Top 10 in the Top 10….

This week, coming off the NFL combine, I thought it would be nice to test the readers of Bro Nameth Sports, and see just what their IQ look likes. Here are 10 sample questions that would be on the Wonderlic Test, the test given to NFL Draft Prospect to see just how smart they really are…. See what you can do with these 10 questions……

1- PRESENT, RESENT - Do these words:

1.       Have Similar Meanings

2.       Have Contradictory Meanings

3.       Mean Neither the Same nor Opposite

2- A train travels 20 feet in 1/5 seconds at this exact speed, how many feet will it travel in three seconds?

3- When rope is selling at $.10 a foot, how many feet can you buy for sixty cents?

4- A boy is 16 years old and his sister is twice as old. When the boy is 22 years old, what will be the age of his sister?

5- What number is next in the following sequence:

32

31

29

26

22

?

6- FLAMMABLE, INFLAMMABLE - Do these words:

1.       Have Similar Meanings

2.       Have Contradictory Meanings

3.       Mean neither the same nor opposite

7- The hours of daylight and darkness in SEPTEMBER are nearest equal to the hours of daylight and darkness in:

1.       June

2.       March

3.       May

4.       November

8- Assume the first 2 statements are true. Is the final one:

1.       True

2.       False

3.       Not Certain

Ben greeted Beth. Beth greeted Bob. Ben did not greet Bob

9- In printing an article of 48,000 words, a printer decides to use two sizes of type. Using the larger type, a printed page contains 1,800 words. Using smaller type, a page contains 2,400 words. The article is allotted 21 full pages in a magazine. How many pages must be in smaller type?

10- Three individuals form a partnership and agree to divide all profits equally. X invests $9,000, Y invests $7,000 and Z invests $4,000. If the profits are $4,800, how much less does X receive than if the profits were divided in proportion to the amount invested?

All of the answers are in the comments section of the Blog. Leave how many you got right on the comments if you aren’t too embarrassed…..

As always, it has been a pleasure. Leave me your thoughts and comments on the facebook post…. See you all Friday morning Suckazzzzzz.